All I want for Christmas

Is a big roll of duct tape ....Don't even ask me what I intend to do with it.
I grow so weary of people thinking everything that happens to them is the end of the world...when in fact, in the GRAND picture, it's nothing. I watched 20/20 last night and saw these women explaining how their babies died due to lack of warmth. I saw an infant on the brink of dying due to malnutrition and all the wonderful people who have given up so much in their own lives, just to be there to help save the lives of strangers. These are HUGE problems and they are out there, yet people will continue to whimper over every little thing that happens to them, like it's the end of the world...or whats even worse are those that post a problem and make it sound like they are doing it out of the kindness of their heart to "Protect" others...Puhleeze!
I recently got a call from a friend and fellow WLS sister. This person had some issues that required surgery (not to do with WLS), she was supposed to be on bed rest, but her Dad, who was recently operated on, start squirting arterial blood everywhere. Needless to say, there went her bed rest...when she returned home to clean up the blood after leaving her dad at the hospital she was notified that her brothers house burned to the ground, Christmas gifts and all. Thank God every one survived. If this person had posted, just to vent, I would have understood. Listen we all need to vent, that's part of what our little WLS family is all about, but there is a thin line between venting and whining and beating a dead horse.
What I find really remarkable, is not only didn't this person post about all her grief...she continues to smile and help others. To me she is an unsung hero. Someone who can set her own needs aside and think of someone else. I hope the angels smile on her in the New Year, she certainly deserves it.
Holiday eating is another issue I think we get very hung up on. We all know what we have to do, yet, I think sometimes we, myself included, hope we will get permission to eat what ever we want as often as we want just for one day...Why else does it worry us? What does Christmas have to do with making healthy choices? Well sure there are more goodies, soooo? Does anyone truly believe, if they ate a piece of candy, a small piece of pie or cake or all three, that you would gain 20 pounds? Do not go into this Eating frenzy Holiday, with a mind set of over indulgence. Plan to eat healthy, make sure your protein is eaten before anything else. If you have room for a small piece of pie and you REALLY desire it, HAVE IT. Get over it and move on. If one piece of pie will send you over the edge, back into old habits, totally out of control, Call a therapist immediately.
The majority of us will enjoy our Christmas to the fullest. It is about family and friends and sharing. It's not all about the food and it certainly is not about guilt. Guilt is an enemy that can cause you to spiral down hill. There is nothing to be guilty for. One indulgence does not a FAT person make. Over indulgence, endless indulgence...now that's a different story and no one is going there. RIGHT? Enjoy!! Have a Merry (guilt free) Christmas...

The Reason for the Season

Oh now there's a big debate for ya. What exactly is the reason for the season?
Well, I was always taught it was to celebrate the Birth of Jesus, but then there were those gifts under the tree. My grandmother told me that was to symbolize the "gifts of the 3 wise men"..That kind of made sense. I remember each Christmas as a child, saying to myself "Thank you Wise men!!!" Then there was that pesky evergreen tree...where Jesus was born they had date tree's, so why the evergreen ? Oh and let me tell you, I searched the Bible (our family bible had lots of beautiful pictures) I could not find that Jolly old Elf anywhere. Again with the questions and boy did I get an education. I would need 3 blogs and you would need about 9 hours for me to explain all the different meanings of all the symbols of Christmas.
I never lost my desire to research the true background of this Happy Holiday, and it truly is . People, even in their rush, seem nicer, more polite. They seem to smile more and give more of themselves. Why is that? Why can't we keep that beautiful inner glow all year long?
One thing we do know is that Jesus was not born on the 25th of Dec...so there goes the reason all shot to hell. In fact Dec 25 was the date pagans celebrated Saturnalia..the birth of the Sun god.
Scholars believe Jesus was born April 17th,6 B.C....Does it really matter?
So many customs from so many different parts of the world came together in this huge melting pot... Santa is even a mixture of many men in a similar suit, depending on where you come from. The idea of gift giving is also a mixture of cultural beliefs and the Tree... we won't even go there. I've already explained that the tree, for the most part, has NO religious significance... So why the issue of Christmas tree's, saying Merry Christmas? Because some people just need a cause. Some people just HAVE to make themselves look like bigger A**holes then they really are.
Who cares? It's a beautiful time of year. Do Christians really need a reason to celebrate the birth of Jesus. No, the fact that we do it along with celebrating other traditions all at the same time, isn't hurting anyone...Is it? Why is it so offensive to a small minority? The even bigger question is why is the Majority tolerating it ? If I could have just one 60 sec. spot on national TV, I'd tell the American people "Let go of your Wishbone, grow a damn Backbone and take your country back. WE ARE THE PEOPLE the constitution speaks of and we have the power"...Oh and when all is said and done...Merry Christmas!!!

Seeing a smile

It is a proven fact that positive people are happier people and smile more often...I try and be one of those people as often as possible.
However, seeing someone smile because of something I have done, makes me the very happiest I can be.
We all have homeless people in our community and yes, some are actually homeless by choice. I've talked to them, I know this for a fact. However, by choice or not, winter is a tough time of year.How often have you seen the same person pushing a shopping card full of his/her worldly possessions ? How often have you thought about giving him/her a warm coat you've outgrown?
We all know of someone in our community who is struggling, a Dad who lost his job, a single Mom struggling to feed her children. How often do we think "I wish I could do something"...What do you suppose would be the reaction on their faces, if they woke up one day and found a bag of groceries on the porch or a couple of wrapped gifts on Christmas morning? I'll tell you what the reaction would be..They would first look puzzled, then they would smile. There are small things we can do, anonymously, that are HUGE in another persons life.
I had a bunch of branch slices ( made some into buttons) This year I painted tree's on them and decorated them with Crystals..made little holiday pins...for no special reason, I just figured I give them to friends along the way. I went to a friends Holiday Luncheon yesterday, found out who was going to be there and made up cards for each, with one of those pin's...Of course they were well received and brought smiles to all the faces , but there was one smile that touched my heart. There was a little elderly lady sitting in the corner. I had never met her but I knew she was going to be there and I knew her name was Ruth. There she sat, not really knowing everyone as we exchanged cards. When I handed her the card she looked surprised, when she saw the pin she got this REAL big smile on her face then looked at me and said "I didn't bring anything for you"...I gave her a kiss and said "Oh yes you did and you just gave it to me...your smile"...She got all teary eyed but she kept smiling. I thought to myself, such a tiny little "nothing" really made some ones day...How great is that?
When I got home I realized we have gifts EVERYWHERE, mostly for the kids and grand kids and I'll bet none of it will be as special as that "nothing" gift was to Ruth.
In lieu of cards this year (although I will still probably send out some special ones :) I've adopted soldiers one each for WW, WLS, Fabric Arts group, Fiber arts groups,and friends. One each for 3 very special friends and one from us. The soldiers share these boxes and while it may be less expensive to send cards, sending cards wouldn't generate as many smiles.
Check out www.anysoldier.com and have a REAL Merry Christmas

How much intestine ?

I really wish that when people post, they would not assume everyone knows what the hell is going on. This is a portion of a rather long e-mail I received this morning " she made it sound like a lot of my intestine would be removed and that's why I won't be able to absorb vitamins. Is this true? How much intestine do they take? Does mal absorption get worse over time? Is that why people lose their hair? I need answers please..."
If one person has a question like that, maybe more do. I know all do not read this Blog, but from feed back I've gotten, many do. They do NOT remove any intestine with RNY surgery...There is a by-pass surgery that does but Cooperstown doesn't do it...Fear not. They do not remove your stomach either. The stomach is double stapled and a small pouch remains at the upper part of your stomach. The pouch is connected to the middle small intestine (je junum).Bypassing the remaining portion of your stomach and a small part of your small intestines, the duodenum and the first part of the je junum. Your stomach will still secrete stomach acids which will flow down and meet the food at the "Y" that was created by the attachment of the intestine. This was explained to me by Dr. Strauss (she also drew me a picture, one I will gladly draw and any meeting, just ask) You can, however find tons of pictures on the Internet. I suggest you do that just to set your mind at ease. You will realize that it is a very small portion of reattachment, you will also read that mal absorption eventually stops for calories and most of vitamins...This is NOT a solution to Obesity, it is a tool used to fight it. Gathering as much information as possible is crucial to knowing what to expect and how it will impact your life. This is not something you decide to do haphazardly and without question. It is a life changing situation and most of us would do it again in a heart beat, so how bad could it be?
I've hurt my hand and I'm typing with one, my left and it's starting to hurt...but do your homework and don't believe all you read on the Thread...people mean well, but often dramatise to the extreme.

Holiday Eating

Some of my "group" really crack me up. There are times when posting seem to hit people in the same way and I wake up to 7 e-mails, all saying basically the same thing.
Yes, there are times life is just that "simple" . Trust me, I can be as "wordy" as the next guy. I believe I've proven that many times LOL We are all there to help and that's the bottom line. At times, some people just feel a need to use more words to explain a situation, because they want you to succeed through the holidays. So take what you need from postings and leave the rest.
Perhaps I am the one that "over" simplified. Lets face it, the Holidays can be rough. Having lost my dad at Christmas, there is always that underlying heartache that normally would cause me to seek comfort foods. Then we have the stress of shopping, baking, visiting...Again I say...Be prepared. I've baked the same cookies for years I don't need to taste them. I LOVE Linzer Tarts mine are phenomenal, I don't make them anymore. I KNOW I will eat them. No one will die if I don't make them, but I will surely suffer if I do. I don't have a problem with parties, I just don't..so why pretend I do to make a point. There is ALWAYS something I can eat, salad perhaps, turkey , maybe ham, fruit? I have yet to go anywhere and not been able to eat something. If it's an evening party I eat a late lunch...RNY people fill up very fast, so it doesn't take much salad. I don't need dessert, if there is something at the dessert table I can eat in moderation I'll have a tiny piece. Right or wrong I can not and will not allow this program to become an obsession...It is my way of life now...It's that simple....the minute one hears "NOT ALLOWED" it's like waving a red flag, it's deprivation. I don't play that game .
I am a person who loves to entertain, loves to cook and loves to make treats for people for the holidays...This program has not changed my life one iota, I've changed my relationship with food.
When ever I hear the sacrifices people claim they make or hear people ask how this will affect their life...I want to scream "It will affect you life as much as you allow it" if you like drama, you'll allow it to go much deeper then it needs to in order to be effective. If you roll with the punches, take what you've learned and carry it over into your new life style, you'll do fine.
As far as my advice for Holiday eating...You know right from wrong. Be mindful, plan ahead and enjoy your Holiday and for Pete's sake stop thinking we are all experts...we are all on this Journey together and we all have a great deal to learn along the way. Merry Christmas

Stress and eating

Every once in a while old habits try very hard to work their way back into my life. With winter here of course there is less sunshine, which has an affect on every one. Then we have the holidays. That always adds to the stress of every day life.
This is a time when exercise seems to slow down. I do not get a chance to walk as far as I'd like or do other things that burn calories. I find that the refrigerator calls my name more often and I heed the call. What is good, is that there is nothing in my refrigerator that I can't eat. It is filled with veggies and fruit and yogurt, my cabinets have low calorie snacks. I do keep some zucchini bread frozen in the freezer just in case of unexpected company. I make Small loaves deliberately so when the friends are gone, so is the bread.
So what am I trying to say....BE PREPARED...I am not different that anyone else. I react to stress and anxiety and depression the same way everyone else does...comfort foods. I KNOW when anxiety hits I will NOT make the best choices, so I PREPARE by not having old comfort food standing by....Now I know those of you with kids and husbands are sitting there saying "That's impossible for me". It certainly is not. Kids do not NEED junk food, it is there by choice...Your choice to placate the whims of children who do not know any better. Let us not forget about the war on childhood obesity. They have 100 calorie snack packs of cookies and chips, if they have to have junk, give them junk that is at least portion controlled and if you need a sweet they are a good alternative for you as well. Husbands are another story, they are grown and you are not their MOMMY, so you may have to actually communicate your needs to them. If they must have chips and candy ask them if they can keep it in the car, the garage, in their tool bin...anywhere that you can't get at it in a weak moment. They have watched you struggle, surely they don't want to see you fall back into old habits.
I have absolutely NO will power, so I depend on others to keep me strong by not making things available to me. Do I slip every so often...Yes I do and I am not the slightest bit guilty about it.
I have indeed has a small piece of BD cake, pumpkin pie, a piece of chocolate...It was planned and I enjoyed it. Anyone that says one piece of pie or BD cake added 150 pounds to their frame is full of crap. NOTHING in moderation is fattening. Is it the best choice...Hell no!! If you can't stop at a small piece, don't even go there. You know what your weakness is, so why test yourself. On the other hand, don't beat yourself to death over a small slip, deal with it and move on. Nothing will send you into the kitchen and to your best friend (the refrigerator) faster then guilt.
There are some people who have gained back some of what they lost, they fall into depression and feel badly about themselves...it is very hard to boost the spirits of a depressed person.But if you are one of those, get reconnected, better yet call me. We all slip and fall, it is staying down that is a danger. Don't let that little gain turn into a big one...you've been there and done that...you had surgery to prevent that from happening again. Hold on to the excitement that you once felt as weight fell off you..it can happen again. DON"T THROW IN THE TOWEL. We are all much stronger then we give ourselves credit for.
Tis the season to plan......

A Better Understanding

Some of you know that this Christmas issue is a hot topic with me. I grew up in a world where it was okay to say Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah or as of 1966 Happy Kwanzaa. I don't celebrate Hanukkah or Kwanzaa, but I'm not offended by those that do and if someone says Happy Hanukkah I am happy with the well wishes and say it right back..I don't have to be Jewish to respect Hanukkah and I don't have to be Black to respect the celebration of Kwanzaa.
Some places that are primarily Jewish or Jewish owned display large Menorahs, this does not offend me, in fact I'd think it odd if they displayed a Christmas Tree.
Hanukkah is the "Festival of Lights", Hanukkah mean dedication or consecration... It stems from the rededicating of the Temple in Jerusalem after it was desecrated by Syrian forces. There was only enough oil to fuel the eternal flame for one day, yet the flame stayed for 8 days until they had pressed more oil. So Hanukkah celebrates a miracle and has deep religious significance.
Kwanzaa on the other hand was originally created by Ron Karenga as an alternative holiday to Christmas. A holiday for Blacks to celebrate themselves and their history. It didn't take long before it became Incorporated into the Christmas celebration and Black families went back to celebrating Christmas as well as Kwanzaa...no religious significance.
I think all people should celebrate Christmas, some from the religious stand point and others, just in the spirit of the holiday. There is nothing wrong with having a season that brings joy and happiness to others..I wish the spirit of Christmas could last all year long, but I'll settle for December. I don't think I'm alone when I say I 'm tired of political correctness. I know I won't make a difference by not shopping in stores that refuse to openly express Merry Christmas, but I won't do it, nor will I bank in a bank that does not display a Christmas tree. I want my Country back to the way it was before all this politically correct BS. We have spent years trying to abolish discrimination...what kind of message are we sending to the rest of the world?
Okay I'll get off the Christmas kick...If I could I'd light up my front lawn so you could see it from space....across 5 acres (at least) it would say, no it would scream "MERRY CHRISTMAS" in lights........