WoooHoooo One year ago today I took a step that would change my life forever. It is a step I have NEVER regretted taking and would do it again in a heart beat.
In the past 2 months I've had to walk the halls of hospitals and parking lots, I've had to do my chores as well as Richards, I've had to prepare for the upcoming winter , which has promised to be a cold and snowy one. I've canned and frozen bushels of beets, carrots, potatoes, string beans,corn and squash.....Last year I could have done NONE of this.
This week-end I walked through stores with my granddaughter and Daughter-in-law, went out to lunch and visited the harvest festival. Last year, even getting in the car was an ordeal, much less walking around.
My diabetes is GONE, as is my High BP and terrible joint pain. I am sure I will get new knee's somewhere down the road. Arthritis doesn't just go away because of bariatric surgery. But the pain is so bearable in comparison, that I'm sure it will be a while and who knows what technology will be like when my time comes.
My world is a brighter place, a happier place. I recently got a piece of e-mail and the person wanted to know what my "secret" was. How could I be so happy all the time...? I must have had a great life. That made me smile...we all wear a mask...and it was nice to know mine works so well.
I did not have a GREAT life. I had a painful and abusive childhood, I was the victim of not one but 3 violent crimes. I've suffered loss of people I've loved and friends I've cared about. Death, tragedy, pain and even murder has invaded my life and left it's scars. You will never hear me blame any of it for my disease of obesity., I have little tolerance for people who use their lives as an "excuse" for what they did to themselves. Sure I have issues, but they are my issues, not the fault of my parents, brother, children or friends. Sure I've been hurt and I will be hurt many times before I die. I can wallow in self pity, or I can pick myself up, brush myself off and move on. It's what I chose to do. Every day of my life, no matter what the prayer or who it's for, there is one line of a prayer I say just for me "let me change the things I can, accept the things I cannot change and give me the wisdom to know the difference"...There is a great deal of sorrow and pain behind my perpetual smile, but a frown would not make it any less, nor would heaping it on someone else's plate. We all believe our problems are the very worst, our struggles, our ailments. or loss and sorrows are far more then the next guys. Perhaps if I have ANY secret to happiness, that's what it is. I KNOW there is far worse out there then I have had to endure and when I start to think about a pity party...I think again and count my blessings.
Not only did this surgery change my body, it also changed the way I see life and the people in it.
I still do not see a thinner person in the mirror, I struggle with that. But I do like the person I see looking back at me. I have told my Starfish story many times (it is written in this blog) I have indeed made a difference in some lives...some remember, some forget...but I know and that's all that matters. This has been an incredible year for me and I look forward to what lies ahead. I don't intend to stop. I am not where I had hoped to be as far as weight, but I'm happy because I am FAR away from where I was. Life in general is tough...how you deal with it can make it hard or easy... I chose to have it easy and happy because it beats the alternative...
Thanks to all who have encouraged and supported me throughout this Journey, I couldn't have done it without you.....
