That it has been for the past few weeks. It is tough trying to do all I usually do with ease, limping along and doing it much slower.
As I have said many times. The reason I did not get the band , is because I have no patience with myself. This carries over in other aspects of my life. I want everything done yesterday and everything PERFECT...LOL I laugh when I write that because my students tell me if there is one word they associate with me it's "Perfect", not that I am...but every time they make a block or sew a row that looks the way it should, I say "Perfect!!", when they feel it is far from it...
I have always been a perfectionist when it comes to things I do. Yet I don't expect people around me to be perfect...and I'm very accepting of the fact that "No one is perfect"...Yet I put a great demand on myself to exceed my limits, thus causing myself stress where there shouldn't be.
I've been working on that. People around me are a great help. I see those who are so far from perfect it is pathetic (although they think they are), yet everything is just "fine", they see perfection in everything they do and it amazes me...It's like "Hellooooo" but then I realize it is all part of their happiness within themselves...Say you are perfect and you are...that kind of rationalization....
I'm cranky with myself...not sure why..The pain I am in is bound to cease. Most pain does. The fact that I can' take anything that will calm it was my own choice back in Oct of 2008. So what the hell am I complaining about?
See that's why I write everything down. I look at what I've written and realize just how well off I am. If life did not have pain, how would we know when we weren't in pain? It is an acceptable fact of life to me...So why am I bitching? I guess because it slows me up and I don't like being slow. I also have a great deal ahead of me...making Christmas gifts, a few Fairs Marilyn and I would like to participate in, classes to schedule..Perhaps I should concentrate on one thing, instead of the whole picture....Then it won't be so overwhelming...
Today I will work some more on my studio with Krista's help.She has been very good about packing up fabric for me so I can reorganize. It's quite a chore...
WOW!! Writing things down really does make a body feel better, even lighter....aaaaaaahhhh
