It's that time of year again when people can finally get up the driveway without fear of being snowed in.
My Oldest and dearest friend Ron managed to grace us (he doesn't get to visit as much as we'd like) with a two night stay. He is always fun to be around and of course he had a lot to say about the "new" me. Actually he said it was "Nice to have the old" me "Back"...He even said I looked younger. Did it make me feel wonderful? You bet it did, but I don't expect to hear that all the time or for the rest of my life...That "Newness" will be accepted after a while and the compliments will stop. I say this because people should be prepared. There are people who NEED those compliments in order to feel successful (I say that in a good way), but you should never feel unsuccessful when they stop..because they will.
No sooner had Ron departed, the bed was stripped, new sheets on, laundry started and room cleaned and refreshed, when Ellen and John arrived. We go back 20 some odd years. They started as clients and ended up wonderful friends. They try and visit at least once a year, to catch up, however they missed last year. Needless to say they also noticed a very big difference and I found it remarkable that John also mentioned that I looked younger...Sheesh I must have really looked OLD when I was 100 pounds heavier. I keep saying "I'm half way to where I'd like to be" and I think it scares people LOL Ellen asked me what I intend to look like? and not in a good way .Actually I will stop saying that because I am more then half way there, not ready to sit back and accept where I am, but I'm heading for ONEderland,(a weight that starts with a ONE) and once I'm there I'll decide on some kind of reasonable number... Numbers are so unimportant to me that it is difficult to have to keep track, but I realize those numbers give incentive to others.
Dealing with praise has always been difficult for me. I hate to seem ungrateful, it is wonderful to hear the appreciation and amazement at what I've done...But I have never been comfortable in the lime light. To me, wanting to be thinner for health reasons is a very natural event. I was dying...I'm not sure people realize that. I had ceased to live, I was existing and weight was piling on in spite of what I ate or didn't eat. I took what I consider to be EXTREME steps to lose the weight as fast as possible to save my life and to me the journey has truly been the reward. Praise is not something I need, nor do I feel I deserve..Anyone faced with death and wants to live would make the same choice. I think the praise goes to those who had their surgery 5 to 8 years ago and maintained it through healthy living. That's the hard part, maintaining...and I'm not there yet...However, I have fought so hard and so long in this battle of the bulge I should think I would never want to visit that war again. I like watching my size drop, I love how I eat and what I eat and I love feeling good as well as happy...Why wouldn't I want to live in that place forever?
Something to ponder.......
My Hidden Treasure
Friday, May 22, 2009
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Wisdom
I just love conversations that pick my brain and make me think.
Of course, having this surgery, leaves the door wide open for all kinds of questions...Some of them surprise me. Recently, while in conversation regarding this surgery I said a few things that left my friend somewhat amazed. She finally said "I admire you so much for your wisdom, you are so smart"... I laughed because I have always believed that wisdom is something that comes with experience (not necessarily age) and Knowledge (or being "Smart") is something we learn from being taught. She sees it as one in the same.
A great many people have crossed through my life, many with not one but several degree's. Very few had any common sense, but they could mesmerize you with their knowledge of certain subjects. On the other hand I have met those with no more then a high school education that are wise beyond their years. So I am not very impressed by titles or degree's but I am in awe of those who cope with life from a realistic and logical view point.
Very often people can not see things as they are, because they want so desperately to see things the way they feel they SHOULD be.
I hear it said, very often, that "New" surgery people are in "a Honeymoon stage"...giving that person the idea that how they feel will end. I think it is a negative statement and unrealistic. In fact there is a lot said that I think can bring about disaster. The word "Invincible" is used a lot...
Perish the thought of anyone feeling "Invincible". We all like to think we are so very unique...in reality we are, both in how we feel physically after this surgery and how we approach it for the rest of our lives. There is a commonality among Obese people, co morbidity factors, such as bad knee's, High BP, diabetes etc. Low self esteem (for different reasons) there are many ways we are alike...However it is our differences that will make or break us. There are some who will take that word "Honeymoon" and be crushed by the fact that the feeling may end. Perhaps if you NEED someone to say "Good job" ...yeah that's going to end, your celebrity status with friends and relatives will end. You will eventually level off and not lose any more weight...But I hope, for anyone on the melting side that reads this, your feeling of pride, accomplishment and success NEVER , ever ends. I do not feel any different now, then I did 7 months ago...I'm just 100 pounds lighter.Because of that loss my health has improved, I am not in pain and I'm not living on meds...That's a fact!! It's a fact that I realize every day. I did this, it hasn't been easy, if fact it's pretty damn hard...but when I look back at where I was and where I am now...Holy shit!!!
That "honeymoon" isn't going to end. None of us is "Invincible" and I would try hard to discourage anyone that feels that way. You can fail...please note I didn't say the surgery may not work. You are human and you may fail. You may lose the feeling of happiness and excitement that your initial weight loss brings. You may fall back into old habits and eat yourself back into obesity. These are ALL FACTS. I think the trick is to be aware of these facts and work on change NOW while you are still happy with your accomplishments. Life is all about choice...It was your choice to have this surgery, it's your choice to win or lose. Actually when you LOSE you win huh? Point is, there are somethings in life where we really have no choice...things happen, but we do have a choice on how we deal with the things that happen...and there is no right or wrong choice...or we'd have a world full of happy, contented people. You can look at something as being fixable and do it or you can wallow in the misery of not wanting to fix it, by thinking you can't. You can wake up each morning thankful for a new day or you can wake up to a morning filled with more pain and indecision...it's your choice. Does it make me a Pollyanna because I choose to be happy? I don't think so, although some do. I choose to be happy because it beats the alternative. My life is not without pain and sorrow, my life is not without loss and suffering...No life is... I just choose to except it as a natural order, a human factor, something I cannot change.
What hurts me most is knowing that there are people I know, people I care about and people I have yet to meet that will never be able to grasp the concept of the way I live my life...There are also people that I have come across that resent the happiness of others and yet do nothing to make themselves happy...Go figure.
Today was just one of those day of deep thought...but they were thoughts I wanted to share.
If even one person can read what I've written and come away feeling better about themselves...then that makes me very, very happy. We have to strive to make a difference where and when we can.
Of course, having this surgery, leaves the door wide open for all kinds of questions...Some of them surprise me. Recently, while in conversation regarding this surgery I said a few things that left my friend somewhat amazed. She finally said "I admire you so much for your wisdom, you are so smart"... I laughed because I have always believed that wisdom is something that comes with experience (not necessarily age) and Knowledge (or being "Smart") is something we learn from being taught. She sees it as one in the same.
A great many people have crossed through my life, many with not one but several degree's. Very few had any common sense, but they could mesmerize you with their knowledge of certain subjects. On the other hand I have met those with no more then a high school education that are wise beyond their years. So I am not very impressed by titles or degree's but I am in awe of those who cope with life from a realistic and logical view point.
Very often people can not see things as they are, because they want so desperately to see things the way they feel they SHOULD be.
I hear it said, very often, that "New" surgery people are in "a Honeymoon stage"...giving that person the idea that how they feel will end. I think it is a negative statement and unrealistic. In fact there is a lot said that I think can bring about disaster. The word "Invincible" is used a lot...
Perish the thought of anyone feeling "Invincible". We all like to think we are so very unique...in reality we are, both in how we feel physically after this surgery and how we approach it for the rest of our lives. There is a commonality among Obese people, co morbidity factors, such as bad knee's, High BP, diabetes etc. Low self esteem (for different reasons) there are many ways we are alike...However it is our differences that will make or break us. There are some who will take that word "Honeymoon" and be crushed by the fact that the feeling may end. Perhaps if you NEED someone to say "Good job" ...yeah that's going to end, your celebrity status with friends and relatives will end. You will eventually level off and not lose any more weight...But I hope, for anyone on the melting side that reads this, your feeling of pride, accomplishment and success NEVER , ever ends. I do not feel any different now, then I did 7 months ago...I'm just 100 pounds lighter.Because of that loss my health has improved, I am not in pain and I'm not living on meds...That's a fact!! It's a fact that I realize every day. I did this, it hasn't been easy, if fact it's pretty damn hard...but when I look back at where I was and where I am now...Holy shit!!!
That "honeymoon" isn't going to end. None of us is "Invincible" and I would try hard to discourage anyone that feels that way. You can fail...please note I didn't say the surgery may not work. You are human and you may fail. You may lose the feeling of happiness and excitement that your initial weight loss brings. You may fall back into old habits and eat yourself back into obesity. These are ALL FACTS. I think the trick is to be aware of these facts and work on change NOW while you are still happy with your accomplishments. Life is all about choice...It was your choice to have this surgery, it's your choice to win or lose. Actually when you LOSE you win huh? Point is, there are somethings in life where we really have no choice...things happen, but we do have a choice on how we deal with the things that happen...and there is no right or wrong choice...or we'd have a world full of happy, contented people. You can look at something as being fixable and do it or you can wallow in the misery of not wanting to fix it, by thinking you can't. You can wake up each morning thankful for a new day or you can wake up to a morning filled with more pain and indecision...it's your choice. Does it make me a Pollyanna because I choose to be happy? I don't think so, although some do. I choose to be happy because it beats the alternative. My life is not without pain and sorrow, my life is not without loss and suffering...No life is... I just choose to except it as a natural order, a human factor, something I cannot change.
What hurts me most is knowing that there are people I know, people I care about and people I have yet to meet that will never be able to grasp the concept of the way I live my life...There are also people that I have come across that resent the happiness of others and yet do nothing to make themselves happy...Go figure.
Today was just one of those day of deep thought...but they were thoughts I wanted to share.
If even one person can read what I've written and come away feeling better about themselves...then that makes me very, very happy. We have to strive to make a difference where and when we can.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Hope
I went up to the peafowl house today, as always with their food and crackers they love so much.
Diana, one of my females was still over in her corner sitting on her 6 eggs (I think she stole 2 from Garbo). Every year for the past 4 years Diana has made a nest and sat on her eggs with no result in chicks. She is such a wonderful Mother, rolling her eggs to a fine polish, she had a wonderful mate that died at a very young age. Then along came Sir Beanie who was too young last year and I think she just laid too early this year.
I knelt down to remove the eggs and Diana became very up set. I backed her off the eggs and as I picked one up, I felt the warmth of that mothers love...How could I remove her hope? These six eggs she has tended to and sat on for over a month...How could I just take them away?
I put the egg back and she immediately pushed her eggs back under her warm body...filled with hope that maybe tomorrow a chick will be there instead.
It isn't going to happen. Their gestation is only 28 days....and I guess I will end up taking one egg at a time for the next few days until they are gone. Will she lay more? Perhaps and maybe these will be fertile. I think she just laid these too early when it was still too cold.
I learned something from that bird today. Hope is a very strong feeling that should not be taken for granted.Emily Dickinson wrote: Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul, and sings the tunes without the words, and never stops at all.
Everything that breathes has hope in there heart for something. For Diana it is the hope of a chick someday. For me it is the Hope that I will achieve my goals...in weight loss that I will remain healthy, change my life style and live better. For the Butterfly project, that I will continue to hear happy stories about how they bring happiness into the lives of those who receive them, Hope that more volunteers will offer to make them and hope that the project lives on long after I'm gone. I read Hope, when a new person enters the program with so many questions and hope for their future. I know what it is to feel hopeless and it is worse then any physical pain and more difficult to remedy. You feel like you have reached rock bottom and there is no where else to turn, no help and no hope for the future. It's the place I had visited right before my surgery and I pray I never go there again. My heart breaks at the thought that there are so many people who will visit that very same place, for the very same reason and not know where to turn for the answers that will breathe a breath of HOPE back into their bodies and minds. I have been blessed with being given the opportunity, through the Mentors program, to give back, to hold out a hand and perhaps some hope....to someone else...Someone just like my Diana who only hopes for one small miracle to help change their life...
Yup , I sure did learn a lot from that bird today.......
Diana, one of my females was still over in her corner sitting on her 6 eggs (I think she stole 2 from Garbo). Every year for the past 4 years Diana has made a nest and sat on her eggs with no result in chicks. She is such a wonderful Mother, rolling her eggs to a fine polish, she had a wonderful mate that died at a very young age. Then along came Sir Beanie who was too young last year and I think she just laid too early this year.
I knelt down to remove the eggs and Diana became very up set. I backed her off the eggs and as I picked one up, I felt the warmth of that mothers love...How could I remove her hope? These six eggs she has tended to and sat on for over a month...How could I just take them away?
I put the egg back and she immediately pushed her eggs back under her warm body...filled with hope that maybe tomorrow a chick will be there instead.
It isn't going to happen. Their gestation is only 28 days....and I guess I will end up taking one egg at a time for the next few days until they are gone. Will she lay more? Perhaps and maybe these will be fertile. I think she just laid these too early when it was still too cold.
I learned something from that bird today. Hope is a very strong feeling that should not be taken for granted.Emily Dickinson wrote: Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul, and sings the tunes without the words, and never stops at all.
Everything that breathes has hope in there heart for something. For Diana it is the hope of a chick someday. For me it is the Hope that I will achieve my goals...in weight loss that I will remain healthy, change my life style and live better. For the Butterfly project, that I will continue to hear happy stories about how they bring happiness into the lives of those who receive them, Hope that more volunteers will offer to make them and hope that the project lives on long after I'm gone. I read Hope, when a new person enters the program with so many questions and hope for their future. I know what it is to feel hopeless and it is worse then any physical pain and more difficult to remedy. You feel like you have reached rock bottom and there is no where else to turn, no help and no hope for the future. It's the place I had visited right before my surgery and I pray I never go there again. My heart breaks at the thought that there are so many people who will visit that very same place, for the very same reason and not know where to turn for the answers that will breathe a breath of HOPE back into their bodies and minds. I have been blessed with being given the opportunity, through the Mentors program, to give back, to hold out a hand and perhaps some hope....to someone else...Someone just like my Diana who only hopes for one small miracle to help change their life...
Yup , I sure did learn a lot from that bird today.......
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Surviving a Trip
WOW!!! What a trip it was. Paducah managed to survive the 3 nuts that descended upon it to boost the economy...and boost we did LOL
It seemed like we laughed the entire trip...even the few time we got lost. Steph has this phone that acts like a GPS...bless that little blue dot (us) and the purple line (the road we follow) of course the good old map helped a great deal as well.
We stayed at Lake Barkley this year and while it wasn't as new as the KD Village cottages, we did have a beautiful lake and a wonderful place to eat.."Windows on the Lake", it was a bit more driving but not enough to worry about...we laughed most of the trip anyway.
There was always some little special surprise that someone picked up to share, so every day was like Christmas...I bought a new rotary cutter and purple cutting board so we even got to share our fabric purchases.
We ate at home 2 nights and the meals were fit for a king...Cooked chicken, shrimp platter and even strawberry short cake...angel cake....and yes I had some. My life is not about denial or dieting...It's about choices and not over indulging...its about eating properly and enjoying life.
It was nice to walk the show and not have to use a cart. It was even nicer to be able to purchase a T-shirt in a normal size. I could never buy one before because they didn't come in my size. It was nice to see Steph surprised. She knew I had lost weight, but I had also gained weight so she didn't expect to see the difference she saw...I liked being referred to as "Thin", although I'm not, I'm sure thinner then I was and I'm still losing.
It was easy to travel , since no special food is required. I did bring some extra protein bars and things containing what I needed, but for the most part, I just ate less, ate protein first, drank a lot of liquid and had a wonderful time.
I think as time passes we all become relaxed with our new life and new way of eating. I don't stress over the protein anymore. I know how to get it in, what to eat and when. It's nice to be able to eat to live for a change instead of living to eat.
I have to unload my camera so I can post some pictures...I think it's time....
Stay with me......
It seemed like we laughed the entire trip...even the few time we got lost. Steph has this phone that acts like a GPS...bless that little blue dot (us) and the purple line (the road we follow) of course the good old map helped a great deal as well.
We stayed at Lake Barkley this year and while it wasn't as new as the KD Village cottages, we did have a beautiful lake and a wonderful place to eat.."Windows on the Lake", it was a bit more driving but not enough to worry about...we laughed most of the trip anyway.
There was always some little special surprise that someone picked up to share, so every day was like Christmas...I bought a new rotary cutter and purple cutting board so we even got to share our fabric purchases.
We ate at home 2 nights and the meals were fit for a king...Cooked chicken, shrimp platter and even strawberry short cake...angel cake....and yes I had some. My life is not about denial or dieting...It's about choices and not over indulging...its about eating properly and enjoying life.
It was nice to walk the show and not have to use a cart. It was even nicer to be able to purchase a T-shirt in a normal size. I could never buy one before because they didn't come in my size. It was nice to see Steph surprised. She knew I had lost weight, but I had also gained weight so she didn't expect to see the difference she saw...I liked being referred to as "Thin", although I'm not, I'm sure thinner then I was and I'm still losing.
It was easy to travel , since no special food is required. I did bring some extra protein bars and things containing what I needed, but for the most part, I just ate less, ate protein first, drank a lot of liquid and had a wonderful time.
I think as time passes we all become relaxed with our new life and new way of eating. I don't stress over the protein anymore. I know how to get it in, what to eat and when. It's nice to be able to eat to live for a change instead of living to eat.
I have to unload my camera so I can post some pictures...I think it's time....
Stay with me......
Saturday, April 18, 2009
One More Day
I am very excited about my trip this year. We are going to a different Lake, a different cabin with a different attitude. Last time was a lot of running around, very hectic. This trip has been planned better and we are hoping a lot less hectic. We'd like to be able to enjoy our cabin as well as the show and the town.
When I look at the picture of the cocoon on this site (some of you remember the original was closed) and I see that Butterfly struggling to free itself, I can really relate. I have picked a number in my head and I want so desperately to reach it so I can move to the next stage of development. The last number was when the cocoon opened for me. It was a number I hadn't seen in a long time..but this next number....well that's a number I haven't seen in decades.
I feel I can not begin to develop into a REAL Butterfly until I get there.
I will probably post pictures as well as the cocoons so people can see the real Butterfly emerge and be able to better understand why the Butterfly is so very symbolic to me.
It wasn't until I started this journey that I realized just what a struggle it is to escape from that cocoon.
This journey is not an easy one (but I've said that many times, haven't I) dieting was cinch in comparison. Problem with dieting is that I didn't learn anything. All I learned from dieting is that if I suffer through it, I'll lose weight. But then what? Even WW, while it did work very well just didn't teach me what I needed to learn. Yet I have seen so many people hatch from their WW cocoon and go on to soar as Butterflies forever. I guess each of us must find the right place, that happy place where we are comfortable. I am so totally comfortable with this solution. I really needed help to reduce the bulk of my weight and allow me the freedom to move without pain so I could be able to help myself. It helped me reverse the cycle and become strong enough to fight to escape this cocoon.
I have gotten so much support from those around me, a great deal from people who have never met me personally but struggle the same battle. I wish I could make everyone as happy as I have become.....Keep checking in...there are bound to be pictures one of these days :-)
When I look at the picture of the cocoon on this site (some of you remember the original was closed) and I see that Butterfly struggling to free itself, I can really relate. I have picked a number in my head and I want so desperately to reach it so I can move to the next stage of development. The last number was when the cocoon opened for me. It was a number I hadn't seen in a long time..but this next number....well that's a number I haven't seen in decades.
I feel I can not begin to develop into a REAL Butterfly until I get there.
I will probably post pictures as well as the cocoons so people can see the real Butterfly emerge and be able to better understand why the Butterfly is so very symbolic to me.
It wasn't until I started this journey that I realized just what a struggle it is to escape from that cocoon.
This journey is not an easy one (but I've said that many times, haven't I) dieting was cinch in comparison. Problem with dieting is that I didn't learn anything. All I learned from dieting is that if I suffer through it, I'll lose weight. But then what? Even WW, while it did work very well just didn't teach me what I needed to learn. Yet I have seen so many people hatch from their WW cocoon and go on to soar as Butterflies forever. I guess each of us must find the right place, that happy place where we are comfortable. I am so totally comfortable with this solution. I really needed help to reduce the bulk of my weight and allow me the freedom to move without pain so I could be able to help myself. It helped me reverse the cycle and become strong enough to fight to escape this cocoon.
I have gotten so much support from those around me, a great deal from people who have never met me personally but struggle the same battle. I wish I could make everyone as happy as I have become.....Keep checking in...there are bound to be pictures one of these days :-)
Friday, April 17, 2009
Getting ready to travel
I had thoughts of cancelling my trip but Rich said it would make him feel terribly guilty.
The deal was, that he do everything required and I would continue to pack.
He did have his test and saw a doctor and made a cardiologist appointment...willingly. So he was either THAT scared or THAT eager to get rid of me LOL
My brother will stay up here with him until my son arrives, so he won't be alone.
I am looking forward to this trip. I haven't seen Stephanie since our last meeting in Paducah and although we talk alot...I've missed her. This is Marilynns first show ever so I am looking forward to seeing the glow on her face...the one any quilter gets when going to a show this size.
I look back to last year and the reasons I could not go. Mainly the pain had become so intolerable that even sitting in one of those motorized cart wasn't an option. The trip in the car would have also been impossible. The show requires a great deal of walking and even with a cart, there is alot to see where a cart is not available.
What a difference a year makes. I've been shopping and walking for hours since my surgery, so I am not the slightest bit concerned that I will do fine...Without 90 pounds of tonage weighing me down (my goodness thats almost another person) I have energy and the ability to walk...it's the little things in life that matter.
I am not sure how much computer access I will have while I'm away, but I've promised myself I will psot more on here and get my at together when I return.
The proof of my recovery from Obesity will be in this coming week...not just in the walking and physical aspect, but in the food choices I make. There will be a great deal of temptation I'm sure...but those with me have been very supportive and I'm sure they won't temp me beyond what I can endure.
My thoughts are with a new Butterfly that is probably in surgery as of this writing. Lois picked up some Butterfly fabric and showed up last meeting with 16 of them. Lisa continues to be a whirlwind butterfly maker and I am blessed to have both of them...along with those who have fallen off the radar a bit...I know the Butterfly Project will survive.
The sun is shining and it is supposed to be 70 degree's today...the outide weather matches the weather in my heart...WoooHooooo
The deal was, that he do everything required and I would continue to pack.
He did have his test and saw a doctor and made a cardiologist appointment...willingly. So he was either THAT scared or THAT eager to get rid of me LOL
My brother will stay up here with him until my son arrives, so he won't be alone.
I am looking forward to this trip. I haven't seen Stephanie since our last meeting in Paducah and although we talk alot...I've missed her. This is Marilynns first show ever so I am looking forward to seeing the glow on her face...the one any quilter gets when going to a show this size.
I look back to last year and the reasons I could not go. Mainly the pain had become so intolerable that even sitting in one of those motorized cart wasn't an option. The trip in the car would have also been impossible. The show requires a great deal of walking and even with a cart, there is alot to see where a cart is not available.
What a difference a year makes. I've been shopping and walking for hours since my surgery, so I am not the slightest bit concerned that I will do fine...Without 90 pounds of tonage weighing me down (my goodness thats almost another person) I have energy and the ability to walk...it's the little things in life that matter.
I am not sure how much computer access I will have while I'm away, but I've promised myself I will psot more on here and get my at together when I return.
The proof of my recovery from Obesity will be in this coming week...not just in the walking and physical aspect, but in the food choices I make. There will be a great deal of temptation I'm sure...but those with me have been very supportive and I'm sure they won't temp me beyond what I can endure.
My thoughts are with a new Butterfly that is probably in surgery as of this writing. Lois picked up some Butterfly fabric and showed up last meeting with 16 of them. Lisa continues to be a whirlwind butterfly maker and I am blessed to have both of them...along with those who have fallen off the radar a bit...I know the Butterfly Project will survive.
The sun is shining and it is supposed to be 70 degree's today...the outide weather matches the weather in my heart...WoooHooooo
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
High Drama
It has been a while and I have missed writing here. For me, writing has always been somewhat cathartic and seemingly necessary to my well being.
Being involved in so many things does not always afford me the time to be able to post here. I began writing something twice before and something came along to get in the way.
Prior to Easter, which was last Sunday, I was busy making things for the kids and getting stuff together for our trip to Long Island.
I was very excited since it was the first Holiday in a while for us. (The kids usually come here)
Rich of course gets very stressed. It's just a personal issue, but extremely stressful just the same.
It was a wonderful visit. We got to see Mother Mary and son Tom who are two very special people in our lives. Mother Mary will be moving from the Island very soon and we will miss her terribly. WE got to eat lunch with Cookie and Russ (two good friends) and I went craft shopping with Cookie which is always fun. Easter was lovely and Ron and Karen did a spectacular job with dinner, one of my favorites, leg of lamb. My daughter was looking good with some recent weight loss and it's always a joy to be with my Grand children.
Rich was very anxious to leave and get home to "Paradise" so instead of resting after getting back from dinner, we hit the road. Lots of traffic but still we were very glad to see the lights of our town. You travel down a very steep mountain and it's almost like landing a plane, the view at night, from high above is just beautiful.
The following afternoon Rich came in from the barn . He looked awful and said he didn't feel very well. He said he was jittery and perhaps his numbers were off. I checked his sugar and it was fine. I gave him an aspirin to chew and told him to get in the car, we were going to the hospital.
When he went with no argument I became even more concerned.
The hospital is just minutes from the house and he was taken immediately. The care was extraordinary. The next morning I got good news. It didn't appear that he had a heart attack but the doc said he did need a cardiologist. Evidently his BP spiked and taxed the heart.
This was the first time Rich had ever been in the hospital and when he looked at me and said "hon, I'm scared" so much flooded through my head. My dad was also a healthy man, even had a physical shortly before he passed away. I will never forget my Dads face as the wheeled him into the ER..he looked at me and said "Honey, I'm so scared"... I am happy we were able to walk away from the hospital with good news, but it was a scary time for both of us.
I was also happy that I was able to stay on track through out the Holiday. Normally , being relaxed and with family will stimulate my appetite. I truly enjoyed the dinner, all of which was good food and several hours later I enjoyed a guilt free dessert.
Next week I head out to Paducah so I doubt I will post here. Hopefully, once I return, I can get here more often and bring you up to date on my progress.
In spite of our recent little drama and in spite of the hectic lifestyle of the past few weeks...I can't recall a time when I have ever been happier. This surgery is truly the best thing I could have done for my self. It may not be the answer for every obese person, but it certainly was the answer for me.
Hope everyone had a wonderful holiday!!!
Being involved in so many things does not always afford me the time to be able to post here. I began writing something twice before and something came along to get in the way.
Prior to Easter, which was last Sunday, I was busy making things for the kids and getting stuff together for our trip to Long Island.
I was very excited since it was the first Holiday in a while for us. (The kids usually come here)
Rich of course gets very stressed. It's just a personal issue, but extremely stressful just the same.
It was a wonderful visit. We got to see Mother Mary and son Tom who are two very special people in our lives. Mother Mary will be moving from the Island very soon and we will miss her terribly. WE got to eat lunch with Cookie and Russ (two good friends) and I went craft shopping with Cookie which is always fun. Easter was lovely and Ron and Karen did a spectacular job with dinner, one of my favorites, leg of lamb. My daughter was looking good with some recent weight loss and it's always a joy to be with my Grand children.
Rich was very anxious to leave and get home to "Paradise" so instead of resting after getting back from dinner, we hit the road. Lots of traffic but still we were very glad to see the lights of our town. You travel down a very steep mountain and it's almost like landing a plane, the view at night, from high above is just beautiful.
The following afternoon Rich came in from the barn . He looked awful and said he didn't feel very well. He said he was jittery and perhaps his numbers were off. I checked his sugar and it was fine. I gave him an aspirin to chew and told him to get in the car, we were going to the hospital.
When he went with no argument I became even more concerned.
The hospital is just minutes from the house and he was taken immediately. The care was extraordinary. The next morning I got good news. It didn't appear that he had a heart attack but the doc said he did need a cardiologist. Evidently his BP spiked and taxed the heart.
This was the first time Rich had ever been in the hospital and when he looked at me and said "hon, I'm scared" so much flooded through my head. My dad was also a healthy man, even had a physical shortly before he passed away. I will never forget my Dads face as the wheeled him into the ER..he looked at me and said "Honey, I'm so scared"... I am happy we were able to walk away from the hospital with good news, but it was a scary time for both of us.
I was also happy that I was able to stay on track through out the Holiday. Normally , being relaxed and with family will stimulate my appetite. I truly enjoyed the dinner, all of which was good food and several hours later I enjoyed a guilt free dessert.
Next week I head out to Paducah so I doubt I will post here. Hopefully, once I return, I can get here more often and bring you up to date on my progress.
In spite of our recent little drama and in spite of the hectic lifestyle of the past few weeks...I can't recall a time when I have ever been happier. This surgery is truly the best thing I could have done for my self. It may not be the answer for every obese person, but it certainly was the answer for me.
Hope everyone had a wonderful holiday!!!
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