They really are...and I am "people". Why do I let the stupid things people say, bother me?
Why does anyone ? We all seem to really care what people think about us, how they view us both intellectually as well as physically. Do we REALLY care? I had to ponder that, especially since I have been feeling very battered emotionally from the quick and unfeeling statements of others. Truth is, we all want to be accepted, we all want what we say to matter, especially when we say things that DO matter. I have done a great deal of research into this surgery. I could post stuff, I could use big $20 words and I could make my point by producing and handing out sheets of valid facts (some very contrary to those that HAVE been passed out or spoken about). I do none of these things. I simply speak plain and simple truth that anyone, regardless of economic status or education, can understand. I do this because it is the way I like to be spoken too. I am not impressed by $20 words, I am impressed with words that mean something and speak the truth. I want to know the truth as YOU know it personally, not the truth from some book or paper that was written 3 years ago, in all probability by someone who never had this surgery.
I think deep down inside, that's what people want. They want the TRUTH about this surgery. They don't want to just hear the good stuff, they don't want to be told that both surgeries are just a TOOL. They want to know how REAL people work with those tools on a daily basis.
In pondering my own question, something I do often, I realize I personally really don't give a crap what people say to me or about me...I can defend myself , but I do give a damn about other people. That's what truly bothers me...Other people being subjected to negative, thoughtless information...There are two sides to ALL stories and both stories need to be heard...No matter what the issue, all sides need to be heard. If someone doesn't like what someone else says because it isn't what they believe to be true...well that's just tough. We all have a right to be heard and believe it our not, sometimes your way isn't the only way. Sometimes life isn't black and white. I also came to the conclusion that pain can cause ugliness, it can bring out the very worst in a person. I think people have seen the very worst of me this week, the pain in my heal is incredible , this is the first time in my life that self hypnosis has had little affect on decreasing my pain. It has also decreased my ability to see and think clearly and to maintain my positive attitude. The only thing I am positive of is taking a chain saw to my foot would be less painful.
I know a solution will be forth coming, I pray it does not include medication that I can no longer take. But I've learned to not cross bridges that have yet to be built (you can fall far and hurt yourself) instead I used another form of meditation and cleared my mind enough to find peace in knowing that "Those that matter, don't' mind and those that mind, don't matter"
My Hidden Treasure
Monday, June 7, 2010
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Do I feel PAIN?
Pain: the sensation of acute physical hurt or discomfort caused by injury, illness, etc.
I looked it up because I wasn't sure. I'm happy to discover that I do indeed know what pain is and I am here to report..loud and clear...My RNY was NOT Painful. I am sick and tired of being made to look like a liar, or worse, a person trying to deceive simply because I tell the truth. The fact that really pisses me off is that I'm not alone. There are many of us who, if we could, depending on the job, would return to work a week after surgery. I resent being made to be foolish, brain dead or numb from the neck down, because some people complain of pain and I did not. I totally resent ANYONE who hasn't had this surgery, standing up and saying "regardless of what you hear, this surgery does HURT"...Well how in the hell would you know?? That's like someone who never had a child saying Childbirth is a walk in the park...How in the hell would they know and who are they to express an opinion on the subject? If you haven't done the walk, don't do the talk.
I found childbirth to be about a 5 in the pain category, I've had worse and the good thing about childbirth is you get a prize which makes it all the more tolerable. I've been with many women in the labor room and most would rate it a 15 on a scale from 1 to 10 and they have every right to...It doesn't mean I'm numb..just means that pain didn't hurt as much as others in my life. Now I personally know someone who had a baby in the toilet, not one labor pain...first baby, very skinny girl...go figure. If you are having a baby you may not want to listen to her because she will tell you there is NO pain connected to childbirth. She is not the norm.
I am not one in a million, right off the top of my head I can name 6 people who had their surgery and felt NO pain. Not only did I feel no pain, I used NO painkillers and I also know tons of people, who even though they had some minor discomfort (their words not mine) right after surgery...Never resorted to pain pills...
When did this surgery become a freaking contest, when did it become a wash woman's work shop? One of the reasons I deplore being with a group of women is because we all eventually get around to Labor Pains...who had the worse delivery, who suffered the longest, who had the biggest baby, who was torn from stem to stern...who the HELL cares? It's over, deal with it and move on..It's history...women have had babies since time began. Most of the world population still has babies with no help , no anesthesia and no pain pills. Would I trade with them? Hell no...I saw my children born, it was beautiful and yes there was pain...But it's over.
When people ask me about my experience I tell the TRUTH, my surgical experience was as pleasant as anyone could possibly ask for from the time I entered the hospital until now...I felt NO pain, discomfort on my left side, but not pain. My stay in the hospital was horrific, perhaps that's why I didn't feel anything...I was so pissed and so up set my endorphins numbed the pain...who knows.
I tell it like it is and some people are very put off by that. Too flipping bad!! I will never tell someone they will feel NO pain...I tell them I didn't and I'm not alone, but on the other side of the coin there are people who complain of pain months after surgery.
Do we look in a nursery and assume that every baby crying is in pain? Every baby sleeping is not...Perhaps the baby crying needs to feel the warmth of the mommy, maybe it's hungry, wet, or maybe it actually has a gas pain that hurts. The baby sleeping is content, maybe because it isn't hungry, or thirsty or in need of any attention...maybe it just likes the feeling of contentment which is more important then any other need at the time.
I have said time and time again that this is a very personal journey. We all react to things different and we are all stimulated by pain differently. I do not think any less of a person who feels pain then one who does not. Because I know all the factors that relate to our tolerance of pain. I may not have any fancy initials before or after my name, but trust me when I tell you I have experienced LIFE, the very worst and best that life has to offer. I have been out in the REAL world for a very long time...I'm not an idiot and I'm not dead from the neck down...I do feel pain. Even the dictionary backs up my claim :-)
For those of you waiting for surgery who may stumble on this blog..I say what I've always said..gather your info, talk to people who have HAD the surgery, we will be honest. The team at Cooperstown is tops in my book and they know their stuff...However, only one can truly speak from experience, having had the surgery...The rest can give you info based on what they have heard and seen...Not all of what they have heard and seen has been based entirely on the "norm". I will say one thing...If you PLAN on being in pain after surgery, you certainly will be...and that's a promise.
I looked it up because I wasn't sure. I'm happy to discover that I do indeed know what pain is and I am here to report..loud and clear...My RNY was NOT Painful. I am sick and tired of being made to look like a liar, or worse, a person trying to deceive simply because I tell the truth. The fact that really pisses me off is that I'm not alone. There are many of us who, if we could, depending on the job, would return to work a week after surgery. I resent being made to be foolish, brain dead or numb from the neck down, because some people complain of pain and I did not. I totally resent ANYONE who hasn't had this surgery, standing up and saying "regardless of what you hear, this surgery does HURT"...Well how in the hell would you know?? That's like someone who never had a child saying Childbirth is a walk in the park...How in the hell would they know and who are they to express an opinion on the subject? If you haven't done the walk, don't do the talk.
I found childbirth to be about a 5 in the pain category, I've had worse and the good thing about childbirth is you get a prize which makes it all the more tolerable. I've been with many women in the labor room and most would rate it a 15 on a scale from 1 to 10 and they have every right to...It doesn't mean I'm numb..just means that pain didn't hurt as much as others in my life. Now I personally know someone who had a baby in the toilet, not one labor pain...first baby, very skinny girl...go figure. If you are having a baby you may not want to listen to her because she will tell you there is NO pain connected to childbirth. She is not the norm.
I am not one in a million, right off the top of my head I can name 6 people who had their surgery and felt NO pain. Not only did I feel no pain, I used NO painkillers and I also know tons of people, who even though they had some minor discomfort (their words not mine) right after surgery...Never resorted to pain pills...
When did this surgery become a freaking contest, when did it become a wash woman's work shop? One of the reasons I deplore being with a group of women is because we all eventually get around to Labor Pains...who had the worse delivery, who suffered the longest, who had the biggest baby, who was torn from stem to stern...who the HELL cares? It's over, deal with it and move on..It's history...women have had babies since time began. Most of the world population still has babies with no help , no anesthesia and no pain pills. Would I trade with them? Hell no...I saw my children born, it was beautiful and yes there was pain...But it's over.
When people ask me about my experience I tell the TRUTH, my surgical experience was as pleasant as anyone could possibly ask for from the time I entered the hospital until now...I felt NO pain, discomfort on my left side, but not pain. My stay in the hospital was horrific, perhaps that's why I didn't feel anything...I was so pissed and so up set my endorphins numbed the pain...who knows.
I tell it like it is and some people are very put off by that. Too flipping bad!! I will never tell someone they will feel NO pain...I tell them I didn't and I'm not alone, but on the other side of the coin there are people who complain of pain months after surgery.
Do we look in a nursery and assume that every baby crying is in pain? Every baby sleeping is not...Perhaps the baby crying needs to feel the warmth of the mommy, maybe it's hungry, wet, or maybe it actually has a gas pain that hurts. The baby sleeping is content, maybe because it isn't hungry, or thirsty or in need of any attention...maybe it just likes the feeling of contentment which is more important then any other need at the time.
I have said time and time again that this is a very personal journey. We all react to things different and we are all stimulated by pain differently. I do not think any less of a person who feels pain then one who does not. Because I know all the factors that relate to our tolerance of pain. I may not have any fancy initials before or after my name, but trust me when I tell you I have experienced LIFE, the very worst and best that life has to offer. I have been out in the REAL world for a very long time...I'm not an idiot and I'm not dead from the neck down...I do feel pain. Even the dictionary backs up my claim :-)
For those of you waiting for surgery who may stumble on this blog..I say what I've always said..gather your info, talk to people who have HAD the surgery, we will be honest. The team at Cooperstown is tops in my book and they know their stuff...However, only one can truly speak from experience, having had the surgery...The rest can give you info based on what they have heard and seen...Not all of what they have heard and seen has been based entirely on the "norm". I will say one thing...If you PLAN on being in pain after surgery, you certainly will be...and that's a promise.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
In Defense of...
Do we ever stop defending ourselves? Should we be thrilled that people care enough about what we say, so much as to dissect it ? If we feel a need to defend something we say, does that make us insecure? I ponder these thoughts (and many other) as I think about something that was said at a recent meeting. Said by someone I regard as above average intelligence and someone I respect as being pretty savvy about technology...Proving once again that people can "floor you" when you least expect it.
This person likened the LAP BAND to a medical implant i.e. heart valve, knee replacement...joint replacements in general. The last data I read, never once mentioned the Band as being a medical necessity...Now I'm guessing one could look at it that way...after all it is a tool used to lose weight and obesity is a killer of many. I guess if you want to make a point about something, any argument is a good one. I'm guessing I could walk to the store everyday...after all it is healthy and more environmentally safe and look at all the gas money I'd save. I could argue the point that everyone should have a gun loaded and ready...what if someone broke into your house...they might kill you.
I am facing double knee replacements and trust me the analogy doesn't even come close to the reality. I have taken every available step in order to avoid replacements, because I have this thing about foreign objects in my body (one reason I didn't have a band) Unfortunately, my options over the years have become less and less. It will be with great trepidation when I finally do have that surgery, but I will because at times the pain is overwhelming.
My obesity caused me physical pain as well as emotional, but I had many choices. I could have dieted, many people do and change their lives forever. Diets just don't seem to work for me. I looked into the Band, but it is a slow weight loss and I saw many problems with the Band that I didn't feel I could deal with...not to mention, knowing me, the port would become my new best toy...That's just the way I am...I was left with a BB in me once upon a time...it was no big deal, not life threatening...but I played with it so much I caused the need for it to be removed...It's what I do...so shoot me. I can't leave shit alone...if I have a scab it annoys me to no end. I usually cover them with a band aide to prevent picking at it. I decided to have RNY because it was the best choice for me, for my life style and for my health..oh and because I didn't want that piece of plastic in my body.
I've heard people say the really TRUST in the LORD and yet surgery scares them, mortality scares them...so I'm left wondering...How deep is their faith? Guess that's sort of like people wondering why I view a plastic ring as an alien...I faced my surgery without a doubt in my mind that God was at my side...It's what I believe. I also believe in RNY surgery as the best of bariatric surgery...I can give you 12 very valid reasons why...but it doesn't mean I'm right...all it means is I'm like everyone on the planet...I have an opinion.
I also have a favorite quote: Fight for your opinions, but do not believe that they contain the whole truth, or the only truth. I'll keep that in mind the next time I hear someone express an opinion I deem ridiculous and without merit.
I've always said life is just one mass of cross roads, we have a choice to have surgery for WL, if we chose to do so, we have a choice as to what surgery to have...What choice we make is the right one for us . Why we choose it is for our reasons and no explaination as to why we did so is necessary. Unfortunately people ask. The best we can do is answer honestly.
I asked a lot of questions before deciding and somehow I knew when people embellished the truth. It's a fabulous journey when entered into for all the right reasons...what ever they may be for you.
This person likened the LAP BAND to a medical implant i.e. heart valve, knee replacement...joint replacements in general. The last data I read, never once mentioned the Band as being a medical necessity...Now I'm guessing one could look at it that way...after all it is a tool used to lose weight and obesity is a killer of many. I guess if you want to make a point about something, any argument is a good one. I'm guessing I could walk to the store everyday...after all it is healthy and more environmentally safe and look at all the gas money I'd save. I could argue the point that everyone should have a gun loaded and ready...what if someone broke into your house...they might kill you.
I am facing double knee replacements and trust me the analogy doesn't even come close to the reality. I have taken every available step in order to avoid replacements, because I have this thing about foreign objects in my body (one reason I didn't have a band) Unfortunately, my options over the years have become less and less. It will be with great trepidation when I finally do have that surgery, but I will because at times the pain is overwhelming.
My obesity caused me physical pain as well as emotional, but I had many choices. I could have dieted, many people do and change their lives forever. Diets just don't seem to work for me. I looked into the Band, but it is a slow weight loss and I saw many problems with the Band that I didn't feel I could deal with...not to mention, knowing me, the port would become my new best toy...That's just the way I am...I was left with a BB in me once upon a time...it was no big deal, not life threatening...but I played with it so much I caused the need for it to be removed...It's what I do...so shoot me. I can't leave shit alone...if I have a scab it annoys me to no end. I usually cover them with a band aide to prevent picking at it. I decided to have RNY because it was the best choice for me, for my life style and for my health..oh and because I didn't want that piece of plastic in my body.
I've heard people say the really TRUST in the LORD and yet surgery scares them, mortality scares them...so I'm left wondering...How deep is their faith? Guess that's sort of like people wondering why I view a plastic ring as an alien...I faced my surgery without a doubt in my mind that God was at my side...It's what I believe. I also believe in RNY surgery as the best of bariatric surgery...I can give you 12 very valid reasons why...but it doesn't mean I'm right...all it means is I'm like everyone on the planet...I have an opinion.
I also have a favorite quote: Fight for your opinions, but do not believe that they contain the whole truth, or the only truth. I'll keep that in mind the next time I hear someone express an opinion I deem ridiculous and without merit.
I've always said life is just one mass of cross roads, we have a choice to have surgery for WL, if we chose to do so, we have a choice as to what surgery to have...What choice we make is the right one for us . Why we choose it is for our reasons and no explaination as to why we did so is necessary. Unfortunately people ask. The best we can do is answer honestly.
I asked a lot of questions before deciding and somehow I knew when people embellished the truth. It's a fabulous journey when entered into for all the right reasons...what ever they may be for you.
Monday, May 31, 2010
Memorial Day
This day always saddens me for some reason...Even as a kid, I don't think I could ever wrap my head around "memorial" and "celebration" in the same sentence. I guess we do celebrate the lives of those who have died, but when I pass military cemeteries and see row after row after row of headstones it just reminds me of the HUGE price that has been paid in the name of freedom. I do hope that sometime during this celebratory day, people will take a moment to remember the lives lost and the suffering that exist in military hospitals.
On to other thoughts..for those who know me, know I keep notes about strange things...always writing..little pieces of paper everywhere LOL Has anyone ever noticed how certain people will latch on to a certain remark as though it was written just for them...and 90% of the time it isn't.
They then feel it necessary to condone there feelings by expressing themselves to others. From my point of view they are just making things worse for themselves airing their insecurities for all the world to see..instead of just asking themselves "I wonder if that remark was meant for me".
If you have ever wondered about things I say..trust me, I seldom have a hidden agenda..I say what I feel and very little of what I say is "person specific". When I have something to say to someone, I say it to them. You can't please all of the people all of the time...I stopped trying a very long time ago.
I am left wondering how many people will use this "Holiday" as an excuse to eat all the wrong things. It always makes me chuckle when I hear someone say, "it was difficult because there was NOTHING I could eat"...Puleeze!!! I've been to many cook-outs, tons of food, always some sort of green salad (since someone is ALWAYS on a diet) always fresh fruit for the same reason and always some kind of meat, be it beef, chicken or fish or all of the above. So what can't we eat?
Yup, there is always too much mayo on the salads and always too many desserts at these affairs..but there is ALWAYS something to eat. the choice is yours so stop looking to blame someone and look within at what you CHOOSE to eat. Hows that for telling it like it is LOL
I hope everyone takes a moment to remember and then uses this day to relax and enjoy family and friends...I know I will...........
On to other thoughts..for those who know me, know I keep notes about strange things...always writing..little pieces of paper everywhere LOL Has anyone ever noticed how certain people will latch on to a certain remark as though it was written just for them...and 90% of the time it isn't.
They then feel it necessary to condone there feelings by expressing themselves to others. From my point of view they are just making things worse for themselves airing their insecurities for all the world to see..instead of just asking themselves "I wonder if that remark was meant for me".
If you have ever wondered about things I say..trust me, I seldom have a hidden agenda..I say what I feel and very little of what I say is "person specific". When I have something to say to someone, I say it to them. You can't please all of the people all of the time...I stopped trying a very long time ago.
I am left wondering how many people will use this "Holiday" as an excuse to eat all the wrong things. It always makes me chuckle when I hear someone say, "it was difficult because there was NOTHING I could eat"...Puleeze!!! I've been to many cook-outs, tons of food, always some sort of green salad (since someone is ALWAYS on a diet) always fresh fruit for the same reason and always some kind of meat, be it beef, chicken or fish or all of the above. So what can't we eat?
Yup, there is always too much mayo on the salads and always too many desserts at these affairs..but there is ALWAYS something to eat. the choice is yours so stop looking to blame someone and look within at what you CHOOSE to eat. Hows that for telling it like it is LOL
I hope everyone takes a moment to remember and then uses this day to relax and enjoy family and friends...I know I will...........
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Memorial Day Sunday
It is a beautiful day today. A clear blue sky and not as muggy as the past few days. It is a day of reflection. There are so many people who will not be celebrating this day with a cook out and friends, but rather lay on some bed in a military hospital in pain...Perhaps missing limbs or believing they are still caught under the Humvee that blew up. What tragic stories War creates. The dead are dead and I will honor their memory and thank them for my freedom..But what about the living casualties of war? Who remembers them?
Yesterday, my grandson, who BTW loves being a little boy and running outside to play with his friends, took the time to place flags on the Graves of fallen soldiers. I am very proud of that little man as well as of his parents for fortifying positive "values".
I do hope EVERYONE, takes the time today to say a prayer, not just for the dead who died for our freedom, but for the wounded who have paid a bitter price for our freedom and the freedoms of others. I may not be entirely thrilled with a president that refuses to salute the flag that he governs nor believe in his idea of "Change" but I do believe in this GREAT country and in the selfless men and women who protect it and my freedom to believe as I choose.
God Bless our fighting men and women and God bless the USA.
Yesterday, my grandson, who BTW loves being a little boy and running outside to play with his friends, took the time to place flags on the Graves of fallen soldiers. I am very proud of that little man as well as of his parents for fortifying positive "values".
I do hope EVERYONE, takes the time today to say a prayer, not just for the dead who died for our freedom, but for the wounded who have paid a bitter price for our freedom and the freedoms of others. I may not be entirely thrilled with a president that refuses to salute the flag that he governs nor believe in his idea of "Change" but I do believe in this GREAT country and in the selfless men and women who protect it and my freedom to believe as I choose.
God Bless our fighting men and women and God bless the USA.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Trying to Remember
That "Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. " I went to the doctor yesterday..an excellent orthopedic surgeon that I truly trust. He listened then looked, looked at ex rays and then said we'd discuss treatment after the MRI. He isn't big on stroking, which is why I like him..He knows his business and sometimes he has to tell you crap you don't want to hear...might as well just say it. I am looking at Hugards deformity, Alberts disease or perhaps both. They are forms of Achilles tendon bursitis...if you've ever know an athlete with Achilles Tendon problems the you know it is extremely painful.
I will not kid you that I dread walking on this foot and at times I want to just sit down and cry...however life is full of pain. If I gave up every time I felt a pain in my life I would have been history at age 5. I find it best to move on...go on with my day as planned. Does it really make a difference? I could sit here with my foot up , babying myself and having a private pity party...Lots would get done Huh? Tonight the pain will still be there , but I will have accomplished something. I have a class this evening so actually I will have accomplish A LOT !!!
I do have to remember as I limp through my day that suffering is indeed optional...
So many people in this world have no feeling from the neck down, the hips down, the knees down...I think of what they would give to be able to feel my pain and consider myself lucky that I am not them...It is so easy for people to sit and "suffer"...but what a waste of time.
The day is Hot , not a cloud in the sky...much too beautiful to waste on suffering...as my friend always says, the pain will go away as soon as it stops hurting..LOL
I will not kid you that I dread walking on this foot and at times I want to just sit down and cry...however life is full of pain. If I gave up every time I felt a pain in my life I would have been history at age 5. I find it best to move on...go on with my day as planned. Does it really make a difference? I could sit here with my foot up , babying myself and having a private pity party...Lots would get done Huh? Tonight the pain will still be there , but I will have accomplished something. I have a class this evening so actually I will have accomplish A LOT !!!
I do have to remember as I limp through my day that suffering is indeed optional...
So many people in this world have no feeling from the neck down, the hips down, the knees down...I think of what they would give to be able to feel my pain and consider myself lucky that I am not them...It is so easy for people to sit and "suffer"...but what a waste of time.
The day is Hot , not a cloud in the sky...much too beautiful to waste on suffering...as my friend always says, the pain will go away as soon as it stops hurting..LOL
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Choices
There has been a lot of talk lately (within my group) about choices, the ones we make and how they affect our lives. Of course I get caught up in other 'answers' and haven't really given it any thought. However one of the girls wrote a poem and used the word Choice in a very profound way and it started me thinking about my own philosophy. Those of you who really know me, know as much of a Pollyanna as I might seem, I am very serious about life in general.
I Choose to be happy. I see life as a series of forks in the road, each fork you come to , you have a choice...how you choose will lead you along a different path to yet another fork...and so on. I.e. you have a choice to go to college or get a job, you choose college, then you have a choice of which major, you pick medicine, then you have a choice of which kind of medicine....Get the picture?
When you have to make a choice and don't make it, that is in itself a choice.
I can't tell you how often someone has asked me "what made you chose RNY". My reasons are my own and even though I can tell someone why I made the choice I did, they have to decide for themselves whats right for them.
I don't believe in the Band. Does it work? Yes, I've seen people do very well on the band, but I've also seen people do very well on placebo's. You have a little plastic ring in you that prevents you from taking in too much food at one time...However, people do find out real fast that they can play games. Then I hear those say they are having it because it can be reversed..WHAT??? Why the hell would you want to reverse something that helps you keep your weight off. If it becomes an emergency RNY can be reversed also. I have no patience for anything that I have to mess with. I threw an old sewing machine away because the thread kept breaking...it was easier to buy a new one. I chose to buy a new one, just like I chose RNY because it is easier. I now have a very small stomach...I can never over eat again NEVER.. I can eat a million small meals and gain weight..but I won't. Every day, and I mean every day, I fortify that statement with positive actions. I WILL NOT gain weight. I like where I am, I like having energy and I will enjoy the rest of my life. I resent people talking about the "Honeymoon" stage or telling me I am "just like" them and they didn't think they would gain either...BULLSHIT!! I'm not like anyone, I'm ME. I've done my time in hell...for what ever the reason (I'm sure there are many underlying factors that lead to my obesity) I've been there, done that and tore up the Tee-shirt.
Perhaps those people who THINK I am like them, never addressed their issues, never truly faced their problems as to why they were Fat in the first place...I have, at least I think I have...and if I haven't I will continue to explore. I no longer make excuses for myself ...my joints hurt for two reasons, I have arthritis and I was too damn fat for too damn long and I put too much stress on my diseased joints...That's why I hurt. Losing a ton of weight with the help of my tool gave me a whole new outlook as well as motivation. I know now that I AM capable of being thinner and healthier, I got the boost I needed to give me the will to succeed..and I will.
Life is the sum of all your choices. Make wise ones and live a happier life. We cause our own pain, we can cause our own happiness......
I Choose to be happy. I see life as a series of forks in the road, each fork you come to , you have a choice...how you choose will lead you along a different path to yet another fork...and so on. I.e. you have a choice to go to college or get a job, you choose college, then you have a choice of which major, you pick medicine, then you have a choice of which kind of medicine....Get the picture?
When you have to make a choice and don't make it, that is in itself a choice.
I can't tell you how often someone has asked me "what made you chose RNY". My reasons are my own and even though I can tell someone why I made the choice I did, they have to decide for themselves whats right for them.
I don't believe in the Band. Does it work? Yes, I've seen people do very well on the band, but I've also seen people do very well on placebo's. You have a little plastic ring in you that prevents you from taking in too much food at one time...However, people do find out real fast that they can play games. Then I hear those say they are having it because it can be reversed..WHAT??? Why the hell would you want to reverse something that helps you keep your weight off. If it becomes an emergency RNY can be reversed also. I have no patience for anything that I have to mess with. I threw an old sewing machine away because the thread kept breaking...it was easier to buy a new one. I chose to buy a new one, just like I chose RNY because it is easier. I now have a very small stomach...I can never over eat again NEVER.. I can eat a million small meals and gain weight..but I won't. Every day, and I mean every day, I fortify that statement with positive actions. I WILL NOT gain weight. I like where I am, I like having energy and I will enjoy the rest of my life. I resent people talking about the "Honeymoon" stage or telling me I am "just like" them and they didn't think they would gain either...BULLSHIT!! I'm not like anyone, I'm ME. I've done my time in hell...for what ever the reason (I'm sure there are many underlying factors that lead to my obesity) I've been there, done that and tore up the Tee-shirt.
Perhaps those people who THINK I am like them, never addressed their issues, never truly faced their problems as to why they were Fat in the first place...I have, at least I think I have...and if I haven't I will continue to explore. I no longer make excuses for myself ...my joints hurt for two reasons, I have arthritis and I was too damn fat for too damn long and I put too much stress on my diseased joints...That's why I hurt. Losing a ton of weight with the help of my tool gave me a whole new outlook as well as motivation. I know now that I AM capable of being thinner and healthier, I got the boost I needed to give me the will to succeed..and I will.
Life is the sum of all your choices. Make wise ones and live a happier life. We cause our own pain, we can cause our own happiness......
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