Day one report

I feel compelled to write this because when I started this morning it seemed like it would be a breeze.
Gosh how soon we forget all we had gone through and what we had learned. Someone asked me today what I felt I did wrong. My answer "I don't feel I did anything wrong, it's what I didn't do right".
We learn a lot in the beginning and then time passes and although we THINK we are doing very well, the changes are subtle . We take a slightly bigger piece of chicken then we know we should have and think "It's just this once...I'm hungry". We may take a small piece of candy because we "Need" it...but don't realize we took a small piece of cake yesterday because we "needed it". Those snack packs that we trade off for, you know the ones that ONLY have 100 calories. We know they are empty calories, but it satisfys a desire. All the while we see no change on the scale and we are happy :-) Little by little we forget to watch the time, we start eating faster, taking bigger bites, eating just a bit more then we have in the past.... What I didn't do was remember. I allowed myself to slip back into habits that I thought I had broken. Does anyone remember me saying this isn't the EASY way out.
I will always suffer from this disease, I will always be a recovering food-aholic. I have the knowledge, I have the tool and I have the support, all of which I lacked before.
I am pleased to be able to nip this in the bud. I realize from reading my journals that I am addicted to carbs. Now, just after less then one day of the "Test" I KNOW I'm addicted because I am going through withdrawal. I'm talking about hidden carbs...not candy and cake.. but pasta, bread, crackers etc. I wasn't over doing carbs, but I was feeding an addiction. Today is carb free and I'm slowly coming to the realization that I may never be able to eat carbs again. Now I know what my friend Jeff meant and it's so true...Carbs are like potato chips...you just can't eat a few.
I am craving something sweet. Thank goodness the "test" allows for protein enriched pudding, which I have made. It will be the treat I give myself, an allowable treat, as an evening snack.
I did opt to have soup instead of a shake for lunch. I just wanted something warm...just like when I first came out of surgery. It certainly does get you back in touch and on the bright side, it also puts you back in control...stay tuned.